Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Some nights just suck

So, this is my first unscrap/uncrafty related post, and mainly just because I feel the need to vent. Some nights just suck. Tonight, I was going through my stack of pictures to figure out which ones I want to scrap at an upcoming crop. This one wallet-sized pic of Rick just fell out onto the floor. I look down and there he is, staring up at me with this big grin on his face. Well, that just did me in. I mean, I guess it's good and it's progress that these rough times aren't coming as frequently anymore. However, when they do hit, they just friggin' suck. They suck! I've got a big project going on at work right now, so hopefully that will provide good distraction for me. In the mean time, though, I have to get through this night. I really, really hate this. Just last weekend, I was feeling good because I did some things on my own, totally independently. Those moments make me think that as awful as this is, I'll get through it. I'll pull through. A totally changed person with part of me forever gone, but I'll just keep on truckin'. Then there's his smile again, and those blue eyes, and the look of happiness with more than a pinch of mischief thrown in. UGGHHHH. Ok, time to head to bed and just cry it out, I guess. Tomorrow is another day, and hopefully, a better one.

4 comments:

Darlene Servolini said...

Oh, dear. I am very sorry you are having a tough night. :(

I do really hope that you feel much better tomorrow and that work does keep you distracted. As you said, keep on trucking! You will push through!

::big hugs!::
Darlene

Michelle said...

Oh Gina... I am so sorry you had such a hard night last week!! You are in my thoughts. I am so proud and happy that you did whatever it was totally independently. I don't know from personal experience what you are going thru, but my neighbor up the street is going thru the same thing you are. She lost Tom Nov. 2007 to an accident at work, leaving her behind with their two kids. She is VERY independent and determined to do any and everything she can on her own. I used to go down and check on her, try and get her out alittle. There have been a few small, little things I have done for her here and there, as she doesn't accept it too often. But, it made me feel good to do something for her and walk away and know that I brightened her day for that moment. Tom's death has certainly changed her. I hope some of those photos bring you some laughs and joy and not just tears. So so sorry, Gina!! Big big hugs!!!

Tracy S said...

*hugs*

Guylou said...

I wish I would be closer to give you a shoulder to cry upon. I am sending you a big hug! I am praying for you!