Sunday, August 22, 2010

The anniversary approaches...

It's rather freaky to me that the one year anniversary of Rick's death is fast approaching. Some days, it seems like he has been gone for so much longer than that. Other days, it's like he passed away just yesterday. It's so hard for me to fathom that I have lived almost a full year without his physical presence in my life; that I am now older than he will ever be; that we won't do the things together that we were supposed to do. I just got back from a trip to Canada. Since he passed away, it was my first trip driving a long distance by myself, staying on my own in a strange city, being away from home for more than two nights, eating dinners on my own in restaurants, and all of the other stuff that comes with traveling on your own. My wonderful friend Terri and her family kept me occupied for part of the trip, thank God. I enjoyed it, but there were some "down" moments, too. You know, those moments where I just thought to myself how much we'd have enjoyed Montreal together. I chickened out before taking the funicular up the Olympic tower. If Rick had been with me, we'd have done it. He'd have encouraged me until I found myself in the darned thing, moving steadily upward. I could still kick myself for passing up the chance of having that view of Montreal, but maybe another time, I'll gather up some courage and do it!

My girls didn't like the fact that I was away from home and have been my shadows since I got back a few days ago. They've always hated it when we traveled without them, but it's even worse now. They get super clingy. I was told by someone (a breeder, maybe) that siamese are prone to separation anxiety. I saw that in our siamese who died a few years ago and I'm definitely seeing it in my girls now, too. Anyhow, I guess I am done blabbing for the night. Here's a layout that I just finished, to be put in Rick's memorial album. I've only finished 4-5 layouts for it so far. I am not pressuring myself; I just work on one when the need strikes. Thanks, as always, for looking and for any comments.


Ok, for some stupid reason, it won't post in the correct direction, although it is saved that way on my computer. Dagnabbit!!!! Any suggestions, anyone? I can't figure out how to get it to rotate.

4 comments:

Diana Joy said...

I can't help with you about the direction of your layout...it is a very nice one. Very attractive, great design and such nice journaling. I'm so sorry about your loss.

Tracy S said...

((((Gina)))) You know I love the LO but I just wanted to tell you that I love ya and am thinking about you as the anniversary approaches. I know nothing about this is easy girl. I am so sorry you have to even deal with any of it at all. :(

Guylou said...

This is a hard time for you! Although my husband has not passed away; I do understand that feeling of loneliness and that aching to have someone to hold you when you are down or scared. I might not be able to do it physically, but please know that I am holding you up in prayers always.

Brenda said...

Gina, this is such a wonderful layout. I wish we could all visit and give you a prolonged hug!